Mother Is Another Word For Teacher

Firstly, I want to send a Happy Mother’s Day greeting to all the wonderful Mothers out there. Yesterday I posted my feelings about my Mother-In-Law and how it took me a lifetime to come to understand and fully love her. She was simply a harder woman to love than some, but by doing research into her life I came to respect her for who she was. I believe that was the way the Lord helped me to strengthen my Eternal family ties. So if you are struggling with a Mother-In-Law/ Daughter –In-Law relationship, have patience and understand that this is a refining process for both of you. Perhaps a story of one who loved their MIL tenderly may brighten your day. The story is the one of Ruth and Naomi. For a brief synopsis of it please feel free to go here and read it.

 

Secondly, today is my mother’s Day. Oh, how grateful I am to my very own mother. My mother has always been a teacher in the very sense of the word. Not only did she willingly sacrifice to teach her own children and grandchildren, but for over thirty years she taught other children too. She was probably the best kindergarten teacher the world has known. Yes, my mother is definitely a teacher! She has taught me so many things; mere words can not express my feelings for this great woman.

  

Gordon B. Hinckley once gave a talk called “Your Greatest Challenge, Mother” where he stated, “I know of no better answer to these foul practices that confront our young people than the teachings of a mother, given in love with an unmistakable warning.”

He then gave a list of things that a mother needs to teach their children.

• Teach your children when they are very young and small, and never quit.
• Teach them to seek for good friends.
• Teach them to value education.
• Teach them to respect their bodies.
• Teach your sons and daughters to avoid illegal drugs as they would the plague.
• Teach them to be honest.
• Teach them to be virtuous.
• Teach them to pray.

These things and many more, my dear mother has taught to me.

Near the end of his address he gave a prophetic warning to all mothers, “Do not trade your birthright as a mother for some bauble of passing value. Let your first interest be in your home. The baby you hold in your arms will grow quickly as the sunrise and the sunset of the rushing days. I hope that when that occurs you will not be led to exclaim as did King Lear, ‘How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless child!’ (King Lear, I, iv, 312). Rather, I hope that you will have every reason to be proud concerning your children, to have love for them, to have faith in them, to see them grow in righteousness and virtue before the Lord, to see them become useful and productive members of society. If with all you have done there is an occasional failure, you can still say, ‘At least I did the very best of which I was capable. I tried as hard as I knew how. I let nothing stand in the way of my role as a mother.’ Failures will be few under such circumstances.”

For heeding the words of this great prophet of God, my dear mother, I simply must say “thank you”. For teaching me all I need to know to be a mother myself, I can say no other praise but “I love you”.

Your great work is shown by the lives of your children and grandchildren. I am assured that when the great day comes, you will hear the words of the Father praising your works, “Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.”

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom.

Mother-In-Law Is Now Mother-In-Love

I suppose I must confess that this tribute to my Mother-in-law was conceived because of an article I read called Turning Mother-in-law into Mothers-in-love. After reading the article memories of my Mother-in-law flooded my mind. My relationship with my MIL was tentative at best for most of my married life. I suppose I could say it was all her fault, but as the article explains, “Life is often a series of epiphanies, little revelations that can change lives and relationships if we apply those new interpretations to our life experiences. The Apostle Paul said in Corinthians: “When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” (1 Corinthians 13:11). For me, putting away my childish attitudes regarding my MIL came as I began to know her better by studying her life. A beautiful sense of understanding filled my heart and, at last, I was at peace with my relationship with her, unfortunately this only came shortly before she passed away.

Upon her passing I was privileged to be the one chosen to compose and deliver the eulogy at her funeral. If you ever have feelings of unkindness towards someone, attempt to write only good things about them. It is a healing process I recommend to all.

As Mother’s Day approaches I felt compelled to share the story of my Mother-in-law, and take joy in the wonderful woman she truly was.

Phyllis Margaret Bjorkman Dowden was born at home, on a Wednesday morning in Logan, Cache County, Utah, on February 21, 1917 to Cyril Oscar Bjorkman and Arlene Eliza Checketts. Her mother said she had a full head of black hair with bangs that looked as if someone had taken scissors and cut them.

Phyllis was the middle of three children born into the Bjorkman family. Her brother Lloyd was born two years before her, and her sister Berenice came two years after her.


While a small child, Phyllis lived the first five years of her life in Utah. Both sets of her grandparents lived very close to her and played an important part in her life. Her Grandma and Grandpa Checketts lived on a farm in Providence, near Logan, a place she loved to visit. Her grandmother had a beautiful flower garden to which she attributed her great love of flowers. Her Grandma and Grandpa Bjorkman were also near to her. Her Grandpa was born in Copenhagen, Denmark, where he joined the church and immigrated to America. He was a fun loving man with a thick Danish brogue; he taught her a Danish song that she never forgot. Her Grandmother was a young woman, just in her forties when Phyllis’ mom and dad made her a grandmother. Consequently, she thought she was too young to carry the title and insisted that the grandchildren call her “mother”. Phyllis said this was quite confusing to such a small child. Many a time, Phyllis would go to meet her grandmother as she came walking home from a session in the Temple.

When Phyllis was five years old her family left Utah and went to live in Bend, Oregon. Her Grandfather managed the Knitting Mills in Utah and her father worked as a traveling salesman for him. When the company built a new mill in Oregon the family moved there to work. This did not prove to be a promising venture and they “lost everything.” They stayed only a short time there and moved on to California.

As a child Phyllis was shy. She spent many a time hiding in the broom closet when anyone came to visit. She was also very strong willed. One time at her own birthday party her mother did something to displease her and she wouldn’t join her guests for a long time.

In California the Bjorkmans lived for a year in Venice. Phyllis’ mother would take the children down to the beach almost every afternoon to play. Here she developed her love for the ocean. The year was 1923 and the beaches were clear and uncongested.

This was the beginning of her long established residence in California. From Venice they moved to a cleaning establishment on San Fernando Road that her father’s Uncle George had purchased. Her mother and father ran the business and lived with the children in the rear of the plant until the “law said they couldn’t live there anymore.” They moved across the street and rented an apartment in the back of a store. It was while living here that her brother Lloyd was hit by a teenage driver while crossing the street and was nearly killed. The rear wheels of the vehicle narrowly missing running over his head. He was left with a scar on his upper lip from the accident. Soon the laundry business failed and they moved to Eagle Rock.

In Eagle Rock they lived in the back of a restaurant that her Grandma Bjorkman was running. Her mother and grandmother did the cooking, while her Aunts Alta, Portia, and Mary waited on tables and did the cashiering. One day her mother had had enough and took the children and started walking towards Glendale to meet dad who was driving home from an errand he was on. When they all met up they drove to Glendale and rented a house on Elk Street, and this is where they stayed.

In Glendale, Phyllis’ mother went to work for a laundry and her father became a salesman for them also. It was here that Phyllis started school at Pacific Grove Elementary School and continued on in the Glendale school system until she graduated from Glendale High School. While in high school she took a sewing class and loved it. In sewing class she finished her project first before anyone else so she was given a pattern and material to make a white pleated skirt. The skirt was so wonderful it was sent to the Pomona Fair and won first prize. This started her long grand adventure as an accomplished seamstress. Phyllis was very artistic and creative. She designed and sewed all her own clothes and hats.


After graduation from High School she went to work as a salesperson in a sports shop called the Dotty Lee Shop on Brand Blvd. This was during the depression and jobs were hard to find. Phyllis made her mind up to get a job and she did. She worked in this shop for about eight years and made $16.00 a week including working all day Saturday from 9 to 9. Here Phyllis was in the height of fashion. She designed clothes and sewed for many people. She was never seen in anything but the best attire, everything matching from her hat to her gloves, from her purse to her shoes. She even made clothes for her sister Berenice. At this time in her life she continued her education by attending night school.



While working and going to school Phyllis was also very active in her church. When Phyllis and her family moved to Glendale, they attended church in an office above a drug store on Brand and Chevy Chase Drive, the office was a meeting place for a Carpenters Union during the week. At that time there were no chapels in the area and very few members of the church. Phyllis was baptized in the old Adams ward in Los Angeles. Because her family moved around so much when they came to California, she did not get baptized until she was 10 years old. She and her sister Berenice were baptized at the same time and have never been separated in any endeavor since.

After meeting above the Drug store, the church services were moved to the Steppers Auditorium on Broadway, it was here she attended Mutual in her teen years and also went to church dances. Then the church moved to meet in the Masonic Hall on Brand Blvd., they met there until the first official chapel in Glendale was built.

While attending the Glendale West Ward Phyllis' Bishop, Reid Callister, introduced her to a dapper young man who had just moved here from Utah to attend The University of Southern California, Lynn Jensen Dowden. In September 1945, she married Lynn at the Wee Kirk of The Heather Chapel, in Forest Lawn Glendale. They were then given a reception in their honor at the home of her bishop Reid Callister and his wife Norinne. Lynn and Phyllis wasted no time in sealing their union for eternity and set immediately out for the Salt Lake Temple to be sealed there. President George Albert Smith, the Prophet of the church performed the ceremony. After the ceremony, Lynn's parents had an open house for them in Salt Lake. When the celebration was over they jumped in Lynn's Plymouth Coupe and headed for Yosemite National Park for their honeymoon.


Next Lynn and Phyllis lived in an apartment in Glendale on Stocker Street while Lynn worked for Bendix Aircraft Corporation. They spent many happy years together enjoying the company of one another in such hobbies as golf, badminton, and "doing the town." During this time Lynn moved into a couple different job situations until he met his long time business partner Bob Garrett, and started Paco Plastics and Engineering.

The year of 1957 was an eventful one for Phyllis. It was in this year that they started their business, built their first home in Arcadia on Fifth Avenue, and were blessed with their first child, Deedra Lynnai. Dee Dee was the joy of their life. Within the next twenty months their lives would change again and their precious son, Gregory Kevin, would join their family. Such happiness could never have even been imagined.


For Phyllis her husband and her children were the light of her life. She prided herself as being an immaculate housekeeper and blessed mother. Many loving hours were spent in the care of her family. She lived to serve them with her whole heart. One of her many great homemaking skills included the art of cooking and entertaining. She was an incredible cook, always trying to please the palate. She would slave for hours in the kitchen making her family's favorite meals with nothing more in mind than pleasing them and expecting nothing of them but a hardy appetite. Her table, when set, was a masterpiece, and her manners impeccable, as well as her children's. She was always the last to be seated at the table and the last one to leave as she took her time to "Enjoy Her Food!"

Being a wife and mother left Phyllis completely fulfilled. She knew the importance of her children and the great responsibility she had to teach them of our Heavenly Fathers Plan for them and how to Choose the Right. She spent many hours reading to her children, making sure they were practicing their piano, dressing them in the finest clothing, (many of which she made) and taking them to primary and church. She was ever steadfast in the everyday practices of the Gospel. They never missed prayers or family night. She was a true Christlike servant to her family and was a genuine follower of the prophet as he advised us to put our family first.

Phyllis was always an active member of the church, holding many different callings, from Relief Society to one of her favorites as a Primary Teacher, with President James Corrigan and Elder Doug Callister being two of her prized students. One of the highlights of Phyllis' life was her experience of being a worker in the Los Angeles Temple. She and Lynn were called to work together there and she recalled those times as some of the most joyous times in her life. She was so contented doing the Father's work and helping others to be able to accept his plan.

The year of 1984 was the beginning of one of Phyllis' favorite adventures, the joy of being a Grandma. Gregory was the first grandchild to enter her life and the "Sun rose and set in him." She experienced this joy again with Andrea, Molly, Emma, Hanna, and Bailey. There were never six more perfect children in the world in her eyes. As she cherished the title of mother she lived for the one of Grandmother.


Phyllis was a woman who was very private, but classic. She spoke her mind, but always held fast to her beliefs. She loved her country and upheld the constitution. If she didn't like you, you knew it, but if she did, you felt it. She loved the gospel and shared it with everyone. She served her God as she served others.

Her goal in life was sketched in one of her journals. It was quoted by one of her favorite speakers, Cleon Skousen;
"Live to Learn-from all that is good and uplifting,
Pause to Pray- asking for help and acknowledging our dependence on the Lord,
Strive to serve- be our brothers keeper, possess charity, the Pure Love of Christ
Think to Thank- Morning and night to our Father in Heaven and to all others for any kindness given to you."

Mom you did truly strive to live your goals and with that as an example at this time, we too wish to Live to Learn, Pause to Pray, Strive to Serve, and lastly, Think to Thank You for the love and example you gave to us.

Remembering you on Mother's Day and always.... Daughter, Wife, Mother and Grandmother.

Mothers, Called and Elected

Before the world was created, in Heavenly councils, the pattern was set and the role of women was prescribed. Called by God, to be wives and mothers in Zion, the blessing of exaltation was to be the reward, only predicated on the faithfulness to that calling. Each woman who is on this earth today chose, or elected, to follow this plan and were rewarded with the tools to make it possible, a body of flesh and blood.

As a woman, ours is the grand tradition of Eve, the mother of all living, the one who understood that she had a calling to fulfill and elected, by choice, to do so. Her choice made it possible that “man might be” so that there would be a fullness of joy.

Ours is the grand tradition of Sarah, Rebekah, and Rachel, without whom there would have been no magnificent patriarchal promises made to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, which bless all of us today.

Ours is the grand tradition of the mothers of the 2,000 Stripling Warriors from the Book of Mormon, who taught their sons to have great faith.

Ours is the grand tradition of Mary, chosen and foreordained from before this world was, to conceive, carry, and bear the Son of God Himself. We have been called and have elected to help with the divine work of the Lord in “bringing to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”

Elder Matthew Cowley taught, “Men have to have something given to them in mortality to make them saviors of men, but not mothers, not women. They are born with an inherent right, an inherent authority, to be saviors of human souls… and the regenerating force in the lives of God’s children.”

President Gordon B. Hinckley stated, “God planted within women something divine”. That something is the gift and the gifts of motherhood.

This eternal calling extends far beyond this life, but is one from which no official release is given. Obedience to the plan that the Lord has set forth in His gospel instruction of discipleship as one who “receiveth His law and does it” makes the promises of Eternal Life sure. Mothers in Zion therefore have received their calling, have elected to fulfill it, and by obedience have made the blessings or promises for doing so sure.

It is such a privilege to be a Mother in Zion.

The picture is of my dear friend Annie, she is to me, a beautiful example of a woman who understands her role as a wife and mother. Thank you Annie for the great example you are for me.

Consecration: Part of A Mother's Love

In the book of 1 Kings in the Old Testament we learn of a beautiful story about mothers. King Solomon, who had just received the gift of an understanding heart, has a case brought before him of two mothers arguing over the possession of one single child. The story is as follows:

1 Kings 3:16 ¶ Then came there two women, that were harlots, unto the king, and stood before him.

17 And the one woman said, O my lord, I and this woman dwell in one house; and I was delivered of a child with her in the house.

18 And it came to pass the third day after that I was delivered, that this woman was delivered also: and we were together; there was no stranger with us in the house, save we two in the house.

19 And this woman’s child died in the night; because she overlaid it.

20 And she arose at midnight, and took my son from beside me, while thine handmaid slept, and laid it in her bosom, and laid her dead child in my bosom.

21 And when I rose in the morning to give my child suck, behold, it was dead: but when I had considered it in the morning, behold, it was not my son, which I did bear.

22 And the other woman said, Nay; but the living is my son, and the dead is thy son. And this said, No; but the dead is thy son, and the living is my son. Thus they spake before the king.

23 Then said the king, The one saith, This is my son that liveth, and thy son is the dead: and the other saith, Nay; but thy son is the dead, and my son is the living.

24 And the king said, Bring me a sword. And they brought a sword before the king.

25 And the king said, Divide the living child in two, and give half to the one, and half to the other.

26 Then spake the woman whose the living child was unto the king, for her bowels yearned upon her son, and she said, O my lord, give her the living child, and in no wise slay it. But the other said, Let it be neither mine nor thine, but divide it.

27 Then the king answered and said, Give her the living child, and in no wise slay it: she is the mother thereof.

Such is the beautiful quality of a mother in Zion. She is willing to consecrate all she has been given for the sake of her children.

On another level, perhaps this division of the “child” could be seen as the impending doom that awaited the children of Israel with the division of the kingdom. Certainly the gift of a child would be the only way to save these wayward children of the Lord as well. Oh, but that is another thing to ponder all together, call me crazy, I simply loved this illustration of the qualities of sacrifice, love, and consecration found in a mother. By the way, try not to get hung up on the fact that these women were harlots....

I like to believe this mother, this woman, was simply one of the "Mothers who know" that Sister Julie Beck referenced in her much debated conference talk. Please take time to read it as Mother's Day approaches. It is a gift you can give to yourself as a mother.

Providing In The Lord's Way

What is the Lords way?

The Lord’s way is so simply yet so perfect. It weaves together the principles of self-reliance and charity to form one beautiful whole. The Lord’s way embraces welfare, meaning the temporal and spiritual well being of the individual. When we provide the Lord’s way it benefits the giver as well as the receiver.

Spencer W. Kimball explained it as such, “Providing for the poor and needy in the Lord’s way means that the giver helps those who are less fortunate by giving according to what he has received from God. He gives freely and with a true spirit of love, recognizing that his Heavenly Father is the source of all his blessings and that he is responsible to use those blessings in the service of others.
The receiver accepts the offered help with gratitude. He used it to release himself from the bondage and limitations of his need and become more able to rise to his full potential, both temporally and spiritually. He then reaches out to help others.
Providing in the Lord’s way humbles the rich, exalts the poor, and sanctifies both. Both are blessed as they keep the Lord’s commandments. Both become more able to give as Christ gives.
Isn’t the plan beautiful? Don’t you thrill to this part of the gospel that causes Zion to put on her beautiful garments? When viewed in this light, we can see that welfare is not a program, but the essence of the gospel. It is the gospel in action. It is the crowning principles of a Christian life.”

The Lord said, “And remember in all things the poor and the needy the sick and the afflicted, for he that doeth not these things, the same is not my disciple.” (D&C52:40)

As Disciples of Christ, we should give of ourselves—our time, talents and resources—to care for those in need. We are better able to fulfill this responsibility if we are striving to become self-reliant, for we cannot give what we do not have.

Each member of the Church has individual welfare responsibilities, these are:
(1) To become self-reliant.
(2) To care for the poor and needy.

Father in Heaven has blessed us with everything. He has given us all our resources and material goods and has given us stewardship over them. He never forsakes us but he does not do for us what we can do for ourselves. He has commanded us to use the things we receive from Him to take car of ourselves and our families. We when do so, we are self-reliant.

“The responsibility for each person’s social, emotional, spiritual, physical, or economic well being rests first upon himself, second upon his family, and third upon the Church if he is a faithful member thereof.

No true Latter-day Saint, while physically or emotionally able will voluntarily shift the burden of his own or his family’s well-being to someone else. So long as he can, under the inspiration of the Lord and with his own labors, he will supply himself and his family with the spiritual and temporal necessities of life.” ( Spencer W. Kimball, Oct 1977)

Marion G. Romney also stated, “Let us work for what we need. Let us be self-reliant and independent. Salvation can be obtained on no other principle. Salvation is an individual matter, and we must work out our own salvation, in temporal as well as in spiritual things.”

There will be times in our lives when we will not be able to meet our needs without the help of others. In these circumstances, we should turn first to our families for help. If necessary, we can also turn to the Church. As part of His Church, the Lord has organized a way to help members as they work to regain their self-reliance. We should determine that we will use the help we receive to become more self-reliant and more able to give to others. We cannot be self-reliant without being willing to work. Work is physical, mental, or spiritual effort. The Lord has commanded us to work, for work is the source of happiness, self-esteem, and prosperity. It is the way we accomplish good things in our lives.

As Disciples of Christ, we should honor our covenants to consecrate ourselves to build up the kingdom of God and to care for those in need. Nearly all of us can give or do something for others, no matter how little we may have. When we strive to give and serve as Christ did, we are abundantly blessed. We overcome selfishness and greed, and we temper our appetites and passions. We develop the desire to give all that we have to the building of the Lord’s kingdom, we retain a remission of our sins, and our confidence grows strong in the presence of God, and we are filled with joy. These are the wonderful blessings that come from giving.

J. Reuben Clark Jr. stated, “The real long term objective of the Welfare Plan is the building of character in the members of the Church, givers and receivers, rescuing all that is finest down deep inside of them, and bringing to flower and fruitage the latent richness of the spirit, which after all is the mission and purpose and reason for being of this Church.”

The message of the beautiful handbook of the Church called “Providing In The Lord’s Way” can even more fully help us to understand the beauty of the Church welfare program. Along with an updated version of this handbook, the Church has just released a DVD called, “In the Service of Your God” to help us learn and apply these welfare principles in our lives. If you haven’t visited the Provident Living website in a while, it is a really great place to receive information in this area.

"By Their Fruits Ye Shall Know Them"

Elder L. Tom Perry, while speaking at Women’s Conference this past weekend, asked the women gathered there to “dedicate themselves to strengthening the image of the Church.” He stated, "Your personal experiences can be of comfort and a blessing to many."



Elder Perry informed them that the Church had even employed professional firms to help define and project the true image of the Church to the world. He also offered some interesting statistics, "51 percent of people have no awareness of Mormon practices and beliefs," that "47 percent of people do not have a favorable view of Mormons," and "that 31 percent of people believe that Mormons are not Christian."

"These statistics clearly show the imperfect way we have communicated who we are and what we believe," said Elder Perry.

Further, he said, one-word impressions of the Church include: polygamy, family, cult, different, and dedicated. Three wrong impressions out of five "is not a good batting average for us."

He explained that significant misperceptions exist about the church and its members. Although 84 percent of Americans have seen Latter-day Saint ads, been given LDS literature, and/or had missionaries approach them, less than 30 percent can identify the church's main claim — "that we follow Jesus Christ, and are the re-established original Christian church…"

So, he asked the women, "How do we close the gap between how we see ourselves and how the world sees us?"

It is certainly true that the best way to give a positive statement to anyone about the Church is by the way we live our lives personally. What they see us, as members, do and how we conduct ourselves can be a testimony in itself. However, an individual’s view of the Church is also made up of the experiences they may have had by way of outside influences. These influences include the media.

Elder Perry offered suggestions on several things we, as members, can to do help people become more aware of our true beliefs. We can listen, know the doctrine, live our standards, be exemplary citizens, be good neighbors, open our mouths, extend invitations, use technology and be bold but not overbearing.

I believe that the media coverage has really distorted the view of many people when it comes to who we are as Latter Day Saints. In an attempt to add some positive influences the Church has had on the world to the biased media coverage that is out there, I published a Hub on Hubpages called Are Mormons Really Monsters?

Please follow that link and leave comments and add your testimony there if you have a chance. Perhaps working together we can show the world that Mormons really are Christians.

By our fruits you shall know us.

Mormon Messages: Little Children

E. T. Sullivan once wrote these interesting words:

“When God wants a great work done in the world or a great wrong righted, he goes about it in a very unusual way. He doesn’t stir up his earthquakes or send forth his thunderbolts. Instead, he has a helpless baby born, perhaps in a simple home of some obscure mother. And then God puts the idea into the mother’s heart, and she puts it into the baby’s mind. And then God waits. The greatest forces in the world are not the earthquakes and the thunderbolts. The greatest forces in the world are babies” (quoted in The Treasure Chest, ed. Charles L. Wallis [1965], 53).



“Behold your little ones. Pray with them. Pray for them and bless them. The world into which they are moving is a complex and difficult world. They will run into heavy seas of adversity. They will need all the strength and all the faith you can give them while they are yet near you. And they also will need a greater strength which comes of a higher power. They must do more than go along with what they find. They must lift the world, and the only levers they will have are the example of their own lives and the powers of persuasion that will come of their testimonies and their knowledge of the things of God. They will need the help of the Lord. While they are young, pray with them that they may come to know that source of strength which shall then always be available in every hour of need.”

Taken from the message, Behold Your Little Ones by Gordon B. Hinckley.